I often think about how familiarity breeds contempt or a better word may be disrespect. It is an easy trap to fall into. The fact is that as we grow more familiar with people and our situations we can choose to have more respect or less. Familiarity does not have to breed contempt.
Recently Robert Kayanja ministered at our services. He spoke about Noah’s sons. He pointed out how Ham disrespected his father when he went into Noah’s tent, saw his father drunk & naked, and told his brother about it. His brothers immediately walked backward into the tent with a blanket and covered their father. One of the things Robert pointed out wast that Noah was in his tent which would be like us being in our bedroom. There is nothing wrong with being in our bedroom naked. Another thing he mentioned was that Ham should not have gone into his father’s bedroom like a little child would. Adult children would knock or be invited in. Shem & Japheth chose to respect their father in spite of the fact that he was drunk and naked in his bedroom. They did not allow their familiarity to cause them to disrespect their father.
Another example is David. He chose to respect KIng Saul even though Saul was attempting to kill him. He respected the office Saul was in as king of Israel. He certainly had plenty of reasons to be disrespectful. He saw Saul at his worst, but he chose a higher road.
It is funny how easy it can be for us to be respectful to people we do not know well. It is easy because we have not seen the everyday side of these individuals. The more everyday life we see in others and situations, the more opportunity we have to be respectful or disrespectful.
In my life, I have the daily opportunity to respect my husband. He is a man who is respected and admired by many. Robb is a pastor, author and speaks to people all over the world. On the other hand, I get to experience the day to day with him. I know his ups and downs. When I choose to look at what I think of as the down side of Robb, I am disrespectful. I get in the flesh toward him and get negative, especially in my thinking. When I choose to see all of his good qualities and admire all he is and has accomplished, I have the utmost respect for him. It is a choice I make.
In everyday life the choice we must make is to be respectful. When we are genuinely respectful, it is an act of kindness.
My prayer is that I am more aware of this in my own life and hope you will be too.
This is so good because it a such a common struggle, particularly with wives. After all, we are commanded to respect just as the husbands are commanded to love…
Mrs. Linda, this post really hit home for me. Recently, I became familiar with Ryan and began to control some things. I’m thankful that he lovingly confronted me. I found myself at a crossroad, was I going to have a pity party and allow the voices (“I am a terrible wife”) take over or was I going to ask for forgiveness and put effort into changing my behavior? I did the latter. Thank God!
Thank you for the encouragement.